Not Quite Hunter Read online

  I snorted. "Right. What about the others? What if they saw you shift into a giant bug monster from hell?"

  I expected laughter, but my joke fell flat. She bit her bottom lip, her attention focused inward, as if lost in thought. I was starting to nod off when she finally spoke. "If you decide you trust them enough to tell them, that's good enough for me."

  I looked at her in surprise and she lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. "I've learned to roll with the punches. Makes life easier. Besides, if they rat me out, I'll track them down, inject them with venom, then suck their melted insides out. Problem solved."

  I grimaced at her. "That's…graphic."

  She just giggled like the demented fiend she was and scooted closer to lay her head on my shoulder. "It's nice," she said softly, "to be able to tell someone. You knew what I was, and yet you didn't bat an eye earlier."

  I laughed. "Uh, hello. Have you met me? First of all, I never really do the smart thing. And secondly, I know a little bit about being a freak."

  She turned her head and snorted against my arm. "Say what you want about your gender, Sam, but you've got balls."

  I shook my head at her bad joke. "Shut up." I glanced around the cave, watching the shadows dance on the walls, cast by the writhing flames. "Can I try to sleep? Or are you going to jelly my insides and slurp them out like pastry filling?"

  Chapter 12

  Sleeping on the rocky ground next to smoky coals made from vomited up bones in the lair of a dead monster wasn't the worst way I've ever spent a night. But I can't say it was on my list of things to do again anytime soon—even with a warm, curvy body pressed to mine. Ahura was a clingy sleeper, it was damp, and I think I had a pebble permanently embedded in my left ass cheek.

  The faint gray above us was starting to lighten marginally, and I was just starting to contemplate looking around for any edible rodents, when Theo's voice echoed around the cavern, calling my name.

  I scrubbed a hand over my face and stood from where I'd been sitting on the ground staring at the remains of the fire. Ahura grumbled and pulled her shirt up over her head, snuggling back into her rock bed.

  "Time to get up, princess," I said dryly. "Our knight in shining armor is here."

  It took a lot of shouting and repeating myself, but eventually I was able to guide Theo and the others into finding and securing the rope I always carried with me on hunts. The end dangled down, just out of reach. I crouched and leapt, using my shifter strength, and was able to brush the rope with my fingertips. "Godsdamned fucking cocktease!" I yelled. "Hold still, you slippery son of a motherfucker."

  Ahura snorted.

  On the fifth try, I managed to grip the rope. Wrapping it around my leg in a crazy move I'd learned from a gnarled old miner Josie knew, I hung upside down and held my hands out to Ahura. "Okay, bug. Climb on."

  She arched an eyebrow. "I know there's an innuendo in there somewhere," she purred, reaching out to clasp my arms. "But I'll save it for later."

  I sighed. "Thank you. Now hurry up before all the blood rushes to my head."

  She made it look easy. I barely had to use any of my own strength. I mostly just had to hang there while she used me as a human rope extender. She did manage to get in a couple raunchy squeezes to my anatomy on the way, and she paused way too long with her crotch in my face. I growled at her and she smirked, moving up the rope.

  Curling up into a dangling crunch, I grabbed the rope and repositioned my legs, pointing down this time. Then I followed after Ahura. The rope swung with the motions of another person, interrupting my rhythm. My hands were chafed to shit, and my thighs were bruised by the time we made it up. But we made it.

  Thank fuck Ahura wasn't human. Or I'd have had to carry her the whole way. And I didn't think even my enhanced cur endurance was up for that. The rope stopped twitching above me, and Ahura gave a shout of joy. I reached the top and a pair of big hands clamped around my waist, lifting me from the crevasse like I weighed nothing. Emerson crushed me to his chest so hard I wheezed.

  "I'm so glad you're okay, Sam," he rumbled, pressing a fervent kiss to the top of my head.

  I wriggled free of his grip and slid to the ground. "I was okay, until you cracked my ribs."

  But his red-brown eyes were full of genuine concern, and I just didn't have the heart to tease him anymore. "I'm fine, Em. We're both okay."

  Ahura laughed. "Oh, I'm more than okay."

  I narrowed my eyes at her, and she smirked. Great. Just fucking great. Now I was going to have to deal with that the all the way home.

  Theo was nearby, his face like a thundercloud, eyebrows drawn together, and his arms crossed. "Well, if we're all done with this touching reunion, can we get the hell out of here? I do have a job to do back in Westhold. I can't miss my own coronation." He spun on a heel and marched off toward the camper, where he began untying the rope, his shoulders stiff and his movements waspish.

  "What the fuck is his problem?" I muttered.

  Fin looked up at me. "Not a fucking clue. He's been like that since yesterday. Little princess can't handle a bit of adventure, I guess."

  I arched my brows at the leprechaun. "Right. Adventure."

  He quirked a smile at me, but it was fragile. "Alright, Saber? You scared the living fuck out of me."

  I knelt, putting myself at eye-level. "I'm fine. A little bruised, but Ahura broke my fall."

  He sighed and tugged a hand through his thick red curls. "If I go prematurely bald, it'll be your fault, cat."

  I grinned. "Life goals."

  He reached out a hand and touched my cheek, pulling me into a soft kiss. I had to admit, I was more shaken than I really knew. Because his touch let some of the tension uncoil and I was able to draw a real breath.

  "My eyes might have been playing tricks on me when we drove away last night," he muttered. "Are we gonna talk about how the unsanctioned chick sure as hell seemed too strong to be a cur?" he asked dryly.

  I sighed. "No. We aren't. As far as anyone else is concerned, she's a cur."

  His moss green eyes met mine and he nodded. "Sure, Sam."

  I stood and turned toward the camper. "Uh, Fin?" I said, feeling more sheepish than I ever had in my life. "I may have freaked out down there. Bad." I clenched my fists at my side, still not looking back at him. "And…I may have…fucked Ahura."

  Silence followed my blunt admission. Then Fin moved in front of me. "So…are you adding her to our…thing? Or is there something else you're telling me?"

  I met his eyes, relieved that he wasn't freaking out. "Nothing else. But…it was just a fuck, Fin. I don't think she's the relationship type."

  I startled when Ahura spoke from right next to me. Creepy-assed fiend and her ninja skills. "It was just a fuck, leprechaun." She shrugged. "Sam was about to lose their shit, so I gave them something better to think about for a while." She slanted a look at me. "That's some fear of the dark you've got there, hunter. I don't think I've ever seen a shifter suffer from life-threatening panic like that."

  I glared at her. "Definitely not relationship material," I confirmed. "For one, she talks too fucking much."

  Ahura just laughed and slapped me on the back. "Let's go, hunter. I want to get home and get paid."

  I shared a glance with Fin. He just shook his head with silent laughter. "You sure can pick 'em, Sam."

  I gave him the middle finger and hurried around to the driver's side of the camper. It was beyond time to get this fucking trip over with.

  Chapter 13

  The drive back home felt longer than it should, even with our stupid detour.

  Ada surprised me. I expected more crying and moping about the death of her bodyguard girlfriend. But even though her eyes were red-rimmed and her expression was grim, the rotund pregnant lady seemed content to soldier on. They might not seem alike on the surface, but I thought she shared that ruthless pragmatism with her cousin. Both of them looked soft and human, but they had steel spines. And her mate just seemed happy to leave the shack v
illage behind and rejoin civilization.

  Ahura's occasional wink or leer, I could handle. Fin's careful watching me when he thought I wasn't looking? Fine. Emerson's insufferable need to hug me, I could predict and side-step.

  But Theo's snappish, bitchy fucking attitude was the last straw. He griped and grumbled about everything. The food was bland, I needed a new rig, my weapons needed upgrading, Emerson needed better tech, we needed better emergency supplies and first aid charms. The list went on, and on, and fucking on. When Fin cut his finger slicing up the wild sand hare we were lucky enough to kill, I thought I was going to have to put the politician down like a rabid cur, just to save my sanity.

  "Why don't you have any medical supplies in this ancient dinosaur of a camper?" he demanded, hands on his hips while he glared at my ransacked storage bins.

  I glared right back and slammed the bins shut. "We do have medical supplies—tourniquets, anti-bleeding charms, anti-venom injections. For actual emergencies!" I shoved the human out the door. My hands tingled and burned with the contact, and I wondered just how many Godsdamned charms he was wearing right now.

  It was full dark, and the others were sitting around the glowing embers of the fire we'd risked to cook the hare. The giant rabbit was big enough to feed us all—even with Emerson along. The fire had been nice—until Theo fucking murdered my last nerve.

  "Fin is fine," I growled, still prowling toward the politician.

  Fin snorted. "I'm not gonna fucking die from a paper-cut. I'm little. Not weak."

  Theo huffed. But he was still seething with anger, and I knew it was only going to get worse unless I put a stop to it.

  "Theo, you've got first watch with me." I looked at the others to tell them to fuck off, but they were already high tailing it. They were smart enough to know I was about to beat Theo's ass, and they didn't want any part of it.

  The camper door banged shut behind Emerson and I rounded on Theo. "What the fuck is your problem?"

  He ground his teeth together. "This whole fucking trip is the problem. You wanted to be in charge of everything. Where are the supplies you were going to procure?"

  I stepped closer, letting my fangs and claws show. His eyes met mine from inches away and I swear I saw a spark in them, like a flare from our tiny fire, there and gone before I could even be sure what I saw. Probably a reflection of an actual spark from the dying fire.

  "You're being a dickbag and you need to chill the fuck out before I gut you just to shut you up," I said, looming into his space. I didn't have much mass to loom with, but Theo wasn't exactly a hulking brute himself. I knew I was being as pissy as he was, but sometimes dominance was the only way to get shit done. I engaged in a good, old-fashioned stare-down with the agitated human.

  It was surprising, but then again, not so much, when the politician just stared right back at me without flinching—this was Theo we were talking about. Most humans would acknowledge the alpha predator in me, even if I wasn't much of a shifter. But this human just lifted his chin a notch and refused to look away.

  I could see the stress in the lines around his eyes. He was strung out. We continued the staring contest for several minutes while the coals next to us crackled and the weird wasteland insects chorused. I tilted my head. "Are you wearing lash extensions?" Rich humans did some dumb shit. And the dark lashes framing his brown eyes were just too pretty to be real. I bet the doe-eyed look helped him win debates.

  My distraction technique worked. He snorted, then raised a perfectly manicured brow at me. "You forced me out here to take first watch with you because you wanted to talk about my eyelashes?"

  I smirked and crossed my arms over my chest. "Seems safer than killing you, dumping your body behind a cactus and hoping no one finds it."

  He let out a massive sigh and collapsed in on himself, his gaze sliding away. "I'm sorry. I admit I have been…out of sorts."

  I laughed. "Out of sorts? I've been seriously considering sorting you out with my blades."

  He sank down onto a massive boulder by the fire and I went to join him, leaning up against a petrified tree stump.

  "I admit, I don't handle…this well." He waved a hand as if to encompass the world around us.

  I arched a brow. "This?"

  He sighed again, putting his elbows on his knees and leaning forward to gaze into the fire. "I feel…ineffective. In my own territory, I have power. I do the planning, and the thinking, and the strategizing, but other people carry out my plans. I move chess pieces in my mind."

  He glanced up at me. "But out here? None of that matters. You and your teammate were nearly killed, and I couldn't do anything about it. All I could do was sit there and feel helpless."

  I snorted. "You drove the camper."

  He shook his head, but one corner of his lip twitched with suppressed laughter. "Well, I'm glad that's settled. I feel so much more useful."

  I plopped down beside him on the massive rock, stretching out my legs so the coals could warm my boots. "You're not useful out here. That's why I told you to stay the fuck home."

  He didn't say anything for a long time. I was studying the vast darkness around us, scenting the air to make sure nothing was creeping up on us, when he finally spoke. "I want to get my hands dirty too," he said quietly.

  I turned my head to find him staring down at his nice, smooth, politician's hands. I remembered the time in my garage when I'd asked him if he was planning on rebuilding a motor. He'd said he wasn't a "real man," because he didn't know how to get his hands dirty like that. I turned toward him a little more, watching his face in the dim light cast by the red coals in front of us. "What is this, some kind of rich boy mid-life crisis?"

  He huffed a laugh and turned his head to meet my eyes. "Something like that. I thought my stupid little mission had gotten you killed, Sam. I insisted on coming with you because I wanted to make sure no political bullshit interfered with getting Ada home. But that was only part of it. It was mostly ego. I wanted to prove I could do more than sit at a desk giving orders and signing papers. And look what happened? I let Ada talk us into that side trip and you almost died."

  I waved away his concern. "I didn't almost die. Not even close. You just thought I died. And why do you even care, anyway? You don't mourn a bullet once it's been used. I'm just a tool, Theo. A hired thug."

  He turned all the way to face me, pulling his legs up to sit cross-legged on the big boulder. "Call it protecting my interests," he said in a strange tone of voice. I stared at him, trying to understand what was going on here. But the shadows on his face hid his brown eyes from me, and I could only see the faintest curve of his mouth as he spoke. "Will you teach me to be more useful? So next time I can shoot something and at least feel a little better about myself?"

  I huffed a laugh. "Do you even know how stupid and male that sounds?"

  He leaned closer. "Come on, Sam. Please? Wouldn't it just be terrible if I couldn't defend myself and you ended up getting blamed for my untimely demise?"

  I groaned. "Fine. Knives. I'm not giving you a gun. I saw how you held my handgun when I gave it to you before. Besides, blades are easy to conceal. That seems like more your style."

  He stiffened, sitting up straight, and turning away, his eyes glinting in the firelight. "What do you mean?"

  I frowned at his reaction. "I just meant because you're a politician and all. That's what you do, right? Make sure only the right people know what's going on? Keep the public in the dark so they're malleable and shit?"

  He glanced at me in horror. "You don't understand anything about what I do, do you?"

  I shrugged, pulling a blade from my leg sheath. "Nope. And I don't care."

  He shook his head. "I'm going to teach you about governing while you teach me how to stab things."

  I made a disgusted face. "Gross. No thanks."

  He chuckled and stood, holding out a hand expectantly.

  I just stared at him. "Oh, no. You don't get to handle my knife until I say you're ready."


  He blinked at me in the dim light, then his expression melted into a leer. "I'm always so surprised at your bluntness, Sam."

  I groaned when I realized what my words sounded like. If you were like thirteen and horny. "Oh, fuck off."

  He laughed, low and rich, and for once it sounded real. Not like a guy who was trying to impress the masses with how suave and put together he was. I stood and went behind him, putting the knife in his hand and wrapping my own fingers around his to keep him from accidentally flinging the blade into something soft. Like my body.

  "Grip it like this," I said against his ear. Then I pulled his arm back, bending his elbow. "Try to come at things from underneath and use your leverage to stab upward. It's easier than coming down from above, especially if you don't have the strength advantage over whatever or whoever you're stabbing."

  He let his body go loose, relaxing into me so I could move him around. Then I took the knife back and had him practice his motions empty-handed from several different positions, while I sat on the boulder and watched him and the area around us simultaneously.

  I didn't show him much. But he was so serious about it. There was no commentary. No arguing. Just genuine questions and a real desire to learn what I had to teach. It was…fucking weird. No one ever treated me with that kind of respect. Even Fin and Emerson griped at me or cracked jokes during our training. When I finally called it quits so we could change watch and get some sleep, he was quiet, his expression thoughtful in the shifting shadows.

  "Thank you," he said earnestly. "I've never met someone who could insult me, challenge me, and help me get stronger at the same time."

  I just blinked at him, frozen in place. "Uh…you’re welcome? Now get in the damned camper. I'm tired."

  We kicked Emerson and Fin out into the night to take watch and I curled up in my bed alone. But my mind kept returning to the look on the human's face, and the ring of truth in his words. What was his world like, if he thought I was some kind of mentor or something?